Essence Pulse 

Sorcery
$0.34 #14234 0.26 5.5 years
You gain 2 life. Each creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the amount of life you gained this turn.
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Cards similar to Essence Pulse expected a card that isn't here?
Reports become test cases the matcher is graded against before an update ships. Delvefall isn't a chatbot guessing, it compares the printed rules text of every card with plain math, and examples like yours decide which differences should count.
Nightmare's Thirst90%
$0.16↓#19356↓0.05↓8.3 years↑
"You gain 1 life. Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the amount of life you gained this turn."
Drag to the Bottom80%
$0.12↓#21670↓0.224.1 years↓
"Each creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is 1 plus the number of basic land types among lands you control."
Death Frenzy78%
$0.12↓#23502↓0.1912.1 years↑
"All creatures get -2/-2 until end of turn. Whenever a creature dies this turn, you gain 1 life."
Gumdrop Poisoner // Tempt with Treats78%
$0.27↓#126830.11↓3.1 years↓
"When this creature enters, up to one target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the amount of life you gained this turn."
Syphon Fuel76%
$0.13↓#21627↓0.13↓1.7 years↓
"Target creature gets -6/-6 until end of turn. You gain 2 life."
Planar Despair76%
$0.18↓#29871↓0.2225.4 years↑
"All creatures get -1/-1 until end of turn for each basic land type among lands you control."
Cry of the Carnarium74%
$0.11↓#23321↓0.65↑7.7 years↑
"All creatures get -2/-2 until end of turn. Exile all creature cards in all graveyards that were put there from the battlefield this turn. If a creature would die this turn, exile it instead."